Introduction
Do you also have a boss whose antennae are more on sending than on receiving, never has time for you, unless you have done something wrong in his eyes? Does he give you a hard time even though the mistake was minor and you never get a compliment if you have done something right?
Actually, you would like to say: my boss is a pain in the ass. There is a good chance that you will go to work with a heavy heart and get more and more stressed out. Waiting for it to pass by itself is not the best solution.
How to do better
In this blog you will discover how you get more rest through a better relationship with your boss. As a result, your job satisfaction could soon return. First I will explain about the reasons you can suffer from work stress from your boss and then you can do the test to find out why you might be stressed.
If you hate your boss or bosses, then I am going to give you a perfect way out at the end of this article. Check it out!
Good boss, bad boss
Because we have to carry out more tasks with fewer and fewer people, we often work long and sometimes spend more time in the office than at home. In such a case it makes sense that you would want to enjoy your work. You want to be useful, work together with nice colleagues, perform well and develop yourself.
In a pleasant working environment, you can handle a lot of work pressure, especially if you are motivated and supported by your supervisor. But if your boss is mainly concerned with spreadsheets or budgets and does not look much at his employees, you may be hugely bothered by that.
Dealing with people
I will admit that there are some successful companies where they appoint the right person as a manager. Unfortunately, it is still too often the case that you are dealing with a boss who, perhaps professionally, gets the highest score, but scores an absolute zero for dealing with people.
Not to mention the man (also read: woman), who shows dominant behavior and abuse of power, fear and panic, leaving half of the staff reporting ill.
You should determine for yourself what behavior your boss is showing. This might help to do so.
Bad boss behavior
Just as you can recognize certain weather types within any climate, you can also predict the patterns in your boss’s behavior. When does he have a good mood and when does the reverse? Many bosses exhibit derailed behavior when they are under pressure from higher management, they do not want to be criticized if something goes wrong or if they do not meet their targets. They are afraid to get issues with their employees and that is reflected in distrust and extreme control of everything you do.
Intended results
Or they threaten not to achieve the intended results and fear their own position within the company. If you ask your boss in that situation, you do not have to expect him to pay a lot of attention to you or listen to you carefully and if he finds out that you are not going to meet your deadlines, chances are it will blow up in your face.
You can also have a boss who is very calm and very deliberate in his decision-making. If he is put under pressure and has no choice but to quickly make a decision, he moves very slowly and wants to get to the bottom of things. This can annoy you very badly.
Bosses also have good sides
Yes, I hear you say, my boss is just like that! Yet most bosses are not too bad people. They are ordinary men and women with certain weaknesses but they also have their qualities. If you do your very best, maybe you can name a few. Someone who appears to you to be very dominant and stubborn can simply have a strong character and a clear vision.
A boss who does not seem to have any attention to the ups and downs of his employees can have good drive and focus on results. The control freak is often very punctual and has an eye for detail. Is there something already coming to you that you can appreciate in your boss? Try naming three good qualities of your boss.
Pitfalls
The irritating behavior of your boss can, surprisingly, result from a good quality that he uses too much. Suppose he is very self-assured, which could make him arrogant or he is cautious and thus slow and silent. If you are modest, you may hate someone who behaves arrogantly.
If you especially like to go at it, you get itchy from a boss who has a wait-and-see approach and wants to think about everything first. You are, as it were, allergic to the behavior that someone exhibits when he falls into this pitfall.
When you can analyze the tricky behavior of your boss by reducing his difficult behavior to the excessive use of good quality your allergic reaction to it can be diminished. Determine which pitfall of your boss you are allergic to and how you normally respond to it.
Test here your risk factors
Surprisingly, not everyone with an incapable boss suffers from boss stress. You can have sleepless nights and have red spots on your neck if you think of your boss alone, while your colleagues seemingly do not have an issue and continue working and whistling.
Do the following test and cross the statements that are applicable to you.
A.
If I do something, I’ll do it right
I do not give up easily
I like to finish my duties
I deliver my work without error
If I did not work again, I would not know what to do
B.
I like to work according to the rules
I do not take risks
I need clear guidelines
I do not like changes
I am rather unsure about my performance
C.
With me, you can go in all directions
I always stay calm, even though I cook inside
I want people to like me
I hate fighting
The working atmosphere must be good
D.
I have a heart for the matter
If I do not do it, no one does it
A deal is a deal
I can handle criticism when it is constructive
If I am right, I want to get it
Results
Now see in which subject you have ticked most of the statements (3 or more) and discover which risk factors you have.
BOX A: You find your work important, you are a go-getter and have perfectionist views.
Risk: Because you set the bar high for yourself, you probably also do this for your boss. It irritates you if it does not meet your strict standards and as a result, you have little respect for him.
BOX B: You like routine tasks and feel good at a familiar workplace.
Risk: New developments and changed procedures make you insecure. You need your boss’s approval for all your output. If you have a boss who likes to delegate and expect your own initiative, you do not know what to do and you function less and less. You blame your boss for lack of clarity and you do not understand each other.
BOX C: You are a social person, you like to commit yourself to others and people know that they can always come to you, including your boss.
Risk: You find it difficult to say no and indicate your limits. You want your boss’s appreciation for all your hard work. If this does not happen, you will try even harder to get that recognition. Frustrations and exhaustion are the results.
BOX D: You are ambitious and feel responsible for the operating result.
Risk: You make your problem quickly and to solve it all, overtime is the rule for you rather than the exception. You often sit on your boss’s chair and feel indispensable. Because of this unclear division of roles, conflicts with your boss are lurking.
Let us know how you came out of this test.
Conclusion + recommendation
After doing this test, I found something about myself, that I had never realized, yet was a big factor in getting stressed by a boss. So, I would advise you, before accusing anybody else, to investigate thoroughly if it is not partly you, who is to blame for work stress.
This said, however, when it is not you, you might be in trouble and in order to protect your position and your health, you will need to take some action. Nothing is worse than having a bad boss and having so over a period of time. Irritations, frustrations, pure annoyance or worse might sneak in and before you know it, your health can be affected.
Choose to be your own boss!
Yes, you can change jobs or companies, but who says that you will not encounter an asshole boss again. In order to avoid all that, you could become your own boss by having your own internet company. You might say, that is not for me, but the possibilities out there are numerous and for everyone. Just find the right program to support you. I have written an article of such a program, probably the best in the world and if you are interested, you can access it through the image just above.
in reply to Dwilli
Many people, holding the boss to the same standards as themselves, do not realize that this is a source of stress. That you come to this conclusion after reading my article makes me happy, as I think I might have helped somebody out there. Sorry, to hear that your days are numbered, but glad that you know and take positive action.
In my 10 years of experience (some say it’s too long) working under the same boss, I’ve been both motivated and stress out being in the same workplace with her. She is no doubt a brilliant individual and there is a lot of profession-related skills that you can learn from her.
However, as the boss who’s always giving out instructions, she can be quite the perfectionist and her ill-tempered behavior over the years doesn’t help either. I used to have a lot of respect for her, but the scale has reduced to some percentage after I’ve seen her ‘dark side’. I used to get stressed out a lot when I focused too much perfection (just like her) on the job, but ever since I started diverting my attention to building an online business on the side, I was able to let loose and let go a lot.
At the end of the day, my own life and health is my priority and I realized that building other people’s dream is just a waste of time if you don’t share the same goals.
Way to go Cathy! You seem to have found a way out of the stress, by working on the side, which is a great option. It can even lead to earning a decent full time income, in which case you can say good bye to your boss. I like the way you put it, building other people’s dreams, why should we?
Hello,The title of your site is fitting “How to beat your boss” and the article’s title “Find out Why you get Stressed from your Boss – Do the Test” I was eager to take the test because I was certain the test was going to help me understand why I get stressed out about my work or if its because my boss is a jack a- – !The concept of the good boss and the bad boss is spot on. My hopes is that every bad boss reads your article! Your test indicated that I find my work important, I am a go-getter and have perfectionist views. I was pegged! I truly believe I do hold my boss to the same standards and my boss in my eyes fall short of my expectation on the regular.It does irritate me and I find myself having very little patience for “HER” and always see myself in a different environment. I know my days are numbered with my employer.After reading your article, I was able to see that I might have some contributing factors and decided to take responsibility and decided I can only control myself. I don’t want the stress to affect my health.Your article was right on time!Thank you for your insightful and very relevant article!Dwilli
I have seen some good bosses and some very bad ones but I have come to realize it all depends on me yes me how long I am willing to take all the bad mouth from the boss if we sit down and looks deeper into our lives then we would realize something is not worthy the stress of bosses but the problems is we are not willing to take the action that will get us from those bosses we are willing to stick with them hoping they will change but they. Don’t ,so you end up working in fear not knowing what might comes next from the boss.so to Me I have realized we employee have to change the course of our lives not the boss we should not give the bad boss that chance to mess our whole life’s.
Yes, it sometimes is not easy to stand up against your boss or your employer. However, life is too short to be stuck with a bad boss for too long. By far the best way, under almost any circumstances, is to take necessary action. In the long run you will be better off!
So in my job, my boss was not a bad person, but boy oh boy did she stress me out. It really wasn’t her fault, because she had stress and requirements from her boss which then trickled down to us, her “sales team.” We had tons of quotas to meet and metrics to adhere to, from time on the phone, number of calls, number of sales, time on break, time we took break, oh the list went on and on.
Now I am a Premium member of Wealthy Affiliate, and I run two websites and do not work for the company any longer. I went from stress to freedom, but it took some time, and some diligence and some patience.
I recommend that anyone who is this stressed out by their boss to look into affiliate marketing, and Wealthy Affiliate is really the only legitimate company I found in my years of looking, and they are free to sign up and run on starter level. You can’t beat it. Plus they train you on how to do it all.
It seems to me that your previous boss was a serious control freak, the type I have written about elsewhere in this site. I admire your courage to join WA and leave your job for freedom. So many of us have taken this step and many more will follow!
In most of my past working experiences, I’ve seen a lot of terrible bosses. There are some patterns that I also realized: Bad male bosses tend to have office politics, while bad female bosses tend to be control freak and work subjectively.
Taking your test above, I now know that what I feel lack from my previous bad bosses is the appreciation (yes I fall in the C category). I’m fortunate enough that my current boss is not like previous bad ones, but I still feel that I need to by own boss. I will check you recommendation above. Thank you
I am glad my article has helped you out finding causes of previous bad relationships with bosses. For many of us, becoming your own boss is a definite life changer. Nowadays and with the aid of the ever growing internet, this has become a very realistic possibility. People have just to realize that there are enormous possibilities out there.
Hi Jerry,
Interesting post! I think we’ve all had an asshole boss at some point in our careers, and maybe more than one. We may have even been an asshole boss ourselves! I am both a boss (although I don’t use that word) and have a boss also. I’ve had plenty of great bosses over the years who I have learnt so much from and have the utmost respect for. It’s not until you get a bad boss that you realise how lucky you were to have had good bosses in the past. A bad boss can change everything. I have seen bad bosses completely obliterate people’s self esteem and made them questions themselves and their own ability. A bad boss can be very damaging for people’s mental health and subsequently their physical health. In fact, bad bosses can negatively impact the bottom line because of the amount of sick leave and turnover that they cause.
I like the sound of the alternative, being my own boss!
You hit the nail on the head by saying that bad bosses can change everything to the negative and to the detriment of your health. My website here says: do not ever let that happen. There are ways out of any situation occurring on the work floor and right here you will find what best to do.
Well this was a great article. It made me think of some bosses past and present.
As for right now I have a great boss. She lets us do our job, never questions our work ethics and never looks over our shoulders because she trusts us.
I also in my life time have had some really bad bosses. A couple I have forgotten but 2 actually stand out. They were actually two of the biggest jerks I had ever seen or met. However at the end of the day I think they made me a better person and until today they actually respect me for not walking out but working through it.
It really does fall on how you handle things. Dont run away and you will be better off for it.
Once again this was a great article.
Dale
You are commended to not run away and work your way through all the bad times. It goes to say that standing tall and fighting back may be a good option. However, I do think that not many people will be able to do what you did and still have success. All credits to you though!
We are humans, and we are bound to make mistakes. But in case of a workplace where the boss doesn’t appreciate at all whatsoever thing you do but always capitalises on your mistakes, here are what to do; study him or her to know her good mood or bad mood, try and work on yourself with the quality of working under pressure. No one is totally bad, there are also good side to bad boss. You just need to know him or her more.
Ok, no one is totally bad, but that does not help you, when you are the victim. Just be sure to take action, when your work situation takes a bad turn. Do not think that things will disappear by themselves.